"It's a time-honored tradition!" I bark to my wife,
She shrugs in defeat and says, "So this is my life."
I know I've upset her, after all she's been cooking
That fifty pound turkey all morning, I've been looking!
But it's Thanksgiving Day, I say to myself!
Then I turn to her again and I worry for her health.
She's feeling the stress, I can easily surmise,
The in-laws are coming and the meal must surprise.
GA_googleFillSlotWithSize(HELAD_publishercode, "ArticleATFMiddleArticle300x250", 300, 250);
They know she's no cook, no ,
So I come to the rescue, if I don't she'll go wild!
I pick up the phone and dial the local gourmet.
It's a grocery store, you see, they'll save the day!
They have all the dishes we need and a turkey to boot.
I throw on my jacket and return with the loot.
Give the wife a sweet kiss and tell her to rest.
She smiles with a sigh and says, "You passed my test."
She turns on the game, says it's what I've earned.
I just missed the kickoff but not the return!
I cheer for my team while I juggle a brew.
This Thanksgiving is perfect, is that all I had to do?
I smile to myself, and prepare for the meal.
When the doorbell starts ringing, I make her a deal.
If you let me watch football every Thanksgiving this way,
Then next year we won't let the in-laws come stay.
She gives me a wink when our guests walk in.
I'm not sure if she agrees, after all, they're my kin.
But then she breezes past and says, "I love you."
And as I watch the quarterback get sacked, I think, "I love you too."
Learn more about this author, .
Click here to send this author comments or questions.